Of hen's nights, weddings and so called happily ever after

At 29, more often that not, most Singaporean girls are expected to be married or at least in some kind of stable relationship, having found the other half aka one's soul mate. So in the past 2 years of my life, i have been subjected to have to attend wedding after wedding of friends and acquaintances. It's that time in our lives, as so they all say.

Please don't misunderstand me. Each wedding of a close friend, always brings much joy to my heart and tears to my eyes. I believe i have remained a firm believer of the sacred ceremony and the joining of lives despite some heart wrenching past experiences that would otherwise have left many jaded.

I remember my girlfriends and i made a pact some years back, in the comforts of Holland Village's Coffee Club, where we shook little pinkies that by the age of 26 we would all have found the "perfect" other half. Being the idealist that i was, and with a past history of only being in long term relationships, i never saw the pact as something i could not keep to. Now, many years later, i attended the weddings of 2 of my closest friends this year, single. I did a quick count of past relationships: 4. I must say i did pretty well in terms of staying in each one, long enough to realize it wasn't the happily ever after for me. 

I have been a bridesmaid many times now, and the recent one was for a very close friend, Chui Ling. I can't begin to express how happy i was for her, having been through a few relationships and finally finding someone to share her life with and who truly deserves her.

Chui Ling's Hen's night Dinner at Table at 7

Chui Ling is one of those friends that i will always hold close to my heart. Each boyfriend i have had, would have had to go through some kind of threatening process from her, and each birthday and Christmas, she never fails to write hand written cards and give me presents that she very carefully puts thought to. She is also fiercely loyal to Zouk. <3

Chui Ling & me

Hence, it was one of those weddings that gave me the hope that love does exist in today's hopeless world, plagued by betrayals, lack of trust and bitterness. (At this point, i can't help but hear "Love in a Hopeless Place" as the background music.)

But i have also vowed to myself to NEVER ever have to put my girlfriends through the pains of the wee hours of the morning tortures. Once again, let me clarify. I am one of the more traditional and conservative individuals amongst many of the people my age that i know. I know it is very hard to tell, given my inks, and appearance plus the nature of my job does not help either. However, i am traditional and maybe in some instances even old school, so i would definitely want to have the tea ceremonies, the Chinese dinners and that my future husband would have asked for permission proper from my parents before proposing to me.

BUT i will spare all my girlfriends the agony of having to wake up at the god forbidden hour of 3 or 4am to go through the rituals of "torturing" the husband's best men.

The rituals of "torture" for the best men

The tasks to complete

Very creative way of "bribing" the bridesmaids- "A*" for Effort!

 So it was morning rituals, duties of a bridesmaid, church wedding and dinner, where not surprising, I found myself as the alcohol-in-charge.

Rose petals for the picture perfect moment

On the way home after the early morning rituals

Chui Ling & Derek <3

Of weddings and love, hens nights and friendships, every girl wishes for her own happy ending. The knight in shining armor, the perfect wedding, the more than perfect marriage- but really, at the end of it all, isn't it true that what matters most is how he makes you feel? If each time being with him, is enough to make you smile and in the simplest of moments be happy, in our very complicated world, a love like that would be enough for me. =)

To the many happily-ever-afters.
2012, bring me mine please! 
<3 very much,
Sof
xx