i love you but you don't love me.
Twirl into my world of randomness, of outbursts of sparkles, of love and life. x
Thursday 29 September 2011
Monday 26 September 2011
in my honest opinion
In my extremely honest opinion, you feel right to me.
like sour and apple or
jelly and tots or
chocolate and wafer or
teh and salem.
#justsaying.
If you only knew how in my world i see us as perfection in this fucked up imperfect world.
But because you are too precious, i have to let you go.
My heart hurts.
like sour and apple or
jelly and tots or
chocolate and wafer or
teh and salem.
#justsaying.
If you only knew how in my world i see us as perfection in this fucked up imperfect world.
But because you are too precious, i have to let you go.
My heart hurts.
Tuesday 20 September 2011
Monday 19 September 2011
SPECIAL IS THE NEW LIKE
i realise the complications of the matter already.
i keep my heart for him.
it's the reason why i leave certain days a bit more flexible so that i can grab those moments to offer a ride or say hello or catch a glimpse or give a lollipop or say a word or have that smile. and because of that, i know that i push other people away. it's not that i'm trying to find a husband tomorrow, but if he cannot give me his heart, logically he cannot have mine. so that, i can then possibly open my heart to others.
but since when are matters of the heart logical. all it takes is just one text or a smile and he's got me.
to set the record straight, it's not that i'm a heartless bitch and i never considered or thought of how she would feel or hurt. but the fact remains that we do feel for each other. and if i have to keep wondering and feeling bad and wondering even more, i will kill myself. so yes i feel bad, that's why i posted that i would let him go because his happiness would mean so much more to me. but other days i just detach myself from it so that i don't think about her.
if he is hurting because she is hurting and the hurting is caused by my existence... then letting him go because he is too previous is the only way to go.
YOU'RE AMAZING AND I BELIEVE I LOVE YOU. BUT I'M NOT WAITING FOREVER. SO IF YOU WANT ME IN YOUR LIFE, TELL ME PLEASE BEFORE I GIVE UP ON YOU AND MOVE ON.
i keep my heart for him.
it's the reason why i leave certain days a bit more flexible so that i can grab those moments to offer a ride or say hello or catch a glimpse or give a lollipop or say a word or have that smile. and because of that, i know that i push other people away. it's not that i'm trying to find a husband tomorrow, but if he cannot give me his heart, logically he cannot have mine. so that, i can then possibly open my heart to others.
but since when are matters of the heart logical. all it takes is just one text or a smile and he's got me.
to set the record straight, it's not that i'm a heartless bitch and i never considered or thought of how she would feel or hurt. but the fact remains that we do feel for each other. and if i have to keep wondering and feeling bad and wondering even more, i will kill myself. so yes i feel bad, that's why i posted that i would let him go because his happiness would mean so much more to me. but other days i just detach myself from it so that i don't think about her.
if he is hurting because she is hurting and the hurting is caused by my existence... then letting him go because he is too previous is the only way to go.
YOU'RE AMAZING AND I BELIEVE I LOVE YOU. BUT I'M NOT WAITING FOREVER. SO IF YOU WANT ME IN YOUR LIFE, TELL ME PLEASE BEFORE I GIVE UP ON YOU AND MOVE ON.
Thursday 15 September 2011
M.A.G.I.C
with him, it always only takes the smallest things to make me happy.
it's probably the reason why everything else though so fucked up is bearable and tolerable.
when i woke up this morning, and i read the messages, it was one of the nicest feelings ever. it's that unexplainable simplicity, that makes me glow all over and feel so happy.
and, i just had to restart my phone and i lost all the messages...
it's probably the reason why everything else though so fucked up is bearable and tolerable.
when i woke up this morning, and i read the messages, it was one of the nicest feelings ever. it's that unexplainable simplicity, that makes me glow all over and feel so happy.
and, i just had to restart my phone and i lost all the messages...
Tuesday 13 September 2011
Monday 12 September 2011
you are my u.n.i.v.e.r.s.e
it's funny how things pan out. it's like tomorrow who will you love? or what will you hate?
i spent the whole of today at ivanho harlim's studio, we are doing a collaboration with Dr. Martens' #First and Forever campaign as part of our 20th Anniversary tie ups.
everyone has their own story. and today i found myself inspired and touched by the simple gestures of the individuals we had chosen to work with us on this project.
it also served as a reminder to me as to why i love zouk so much. why i have given all of myself to this institution that has now become more than a brand, a lifestyle and a passion for many including myself. why every small thing matters. why it means this much to me.
ZOUK is my first love and also the reason some days i hurt so much because i care too much.
my heart is in a state of confusion. i believe i'm emotionally in distress. because the person that i like very much, loves another. maybe likes me, but im unsure. i can't really talk about it neither can i do anything about it. it seriously kind of sucks.
i don't wish to awaken each day and wonder if i can love this person because this person makes my heart skip that extra beat, makes me smile even on my worst days. yet he is not mine and maybe will never be.
i hate myself for trying to want something so bad when it can never be mine.
i spent the whole of today at ivanho harlim's studio, we are doing a collaboration with Dr. Martens' #First and Forever campaign as part of our 20th Anniversary tie ups.
everyone has their own story. and today i found myself inspired and touched by the simple gestures of the individuals we had chosen to work with us on this project.
 |
| Dr. Martens #FirstandForever campaign 2011 |
it also served as a reminder to me as to why i love zouk so much. why i have given all of myself to this institution that has now become more than a brand, a lifestyle and a passion for many including myself. why every small thing matters. why it means this much to me.
ZOUK is my first love and also the reason some days i hurt so much because i care too much.
my heart is in a state of confusion. i believe i'm emotionally in distress. because the person that i like very much, loves another. maybe likes me, but im unsure. i can't really talk about it neither can i do anything about it. it seriously kind of sucks.
i don't wish to awaken each day and wonder if i can love this person because this person makes my heart skip that extra beat, makes me smile even on my worst days. yet he is not mine and maybe will never be.
i hate myself for trying to want something so bad when it can never be mine.
tomorrow maybe i can love you.
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